


Online, off line

by formersheroes



Category: Twenty One Pilots
Genre: A little bit ansgt, Alternate Universe - High School, Ending open to interpretation, Josh is the popular kid, M/M, Online life, Sad, Tyler has FOMO, Tyler has a lot of insecurities, Tyler is quiet
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-16
Updated: 2016-10-16
Packaged: 2018-08-22 18:52:29
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,179
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8296403
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/formersheroes/pseuds/formersheroes
Summary: FOMO, the fear of missing out.Tyler wasn't jealous. Tyler tried to get better, he really did.





	

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you'll like it,  
> Even if it's not the happiest story  
> Enjoy;
> 
> ###### 

At the age of 14, Tyler got his first cell phone. It was an old Iphone, not the best, but he wasn't complaining, finally his parents had bought him the object he envied so much in the hands of all the other kids.

The phone was not the best, but it worked, and Tyler could go on the internet, he could take pictures. He could share on social medias all his pictures, he could keep in touch with friends that had moved out or changed school.

He had all social medias possible, Instagram, where he would post nice pictures, with nice captions, over the course of a year he had collected 121 followers, which he was very proud of.  
On Facebook he would keep in touch with friends, watching them rant about their new schools, their teachers, Tyler would share inspirational pages and post, and always had over 30 likes. 

On other social medias, he would do the same, share, comment, always trying to be inspirational. 

He didn't want fame, he just wanted to have a community with whom he could share his thoughts, where he could share his writings, even share songs he wrote; without the fear of being judged. 

*****

When he turned 16, he bought a new phone, more performing, the camera was better, his pictures were clearer, and better for his aesthetic.  
Tyler was still on social media, still sharing his thoughts, still commenting, still ranting, still sharing. 

He had now 223 followers on Instagram, his little pride. Not so many people would comment, but one post would give him around 54 likes, Tyler was happy with it. As long as he could inspires someone behind their screen.

*****

Febuary, it's when he came around. Josh, he was in Tyler's school, he had green hair, gauges, was well built, everybody was gathering around him. They were attracted to him, he wasn't. Josh barely talked to anyone in school, and when he did, it was because he hadn't the choice. Tyler found it funny, he would watch the girls try to flirt with the green haired boy, they were always rejected with a huff, sometimes Josh wouldn't even accord them a look. And still they didn't stop.

Tyler found it funny, but sad at the same time. He wasn't jealous, but the other had lots of girls at his feet and he wouldn't even dare look at them.  
Tyler didn't understand why people would stick to Josh, wanting his attention like he was some sort of God. But Tyler wasn't jealous, he would stay in the back of the class or the hallway, watching from far away, hidden behind his phone screening, uploading his medias on what was going on.  
Nobody would answer, but Tyler was better after writing it, deep down, he hoped that maybe, one day someone would see it.

*****

It's only in March that Tyler found Josh's Instagram, the boy had over 1K of followers, his aesthetic was boring, yet, people seemed to like it. Josh was posting random thing, with a bad spelling, sometimes Tyler was even struggling to read it. He wondered why people liked his page, it was unoriginal, Tyler had seen it over and over, he was sick of it. Yet, people liked it. 

It made Tyler's stomach knot, he wasn't jealous, but he was sad. He was putting some much effort in doing something beautiful with his page, something original, unseen before, what he always wanted was to help people online, by sharing his experience.

Tyler would share about his mental-health, he wished it could help someone feel better, knowing they weren't alone. He hoped a lot of things, but in the end, he didn't know if his post truly did something to change someone's life.

Tyler followed Josh, but Josh never followed back, Tyler expected it. He was just an insignificant 230 followers account, Josh wouldn't be interested in what Tyler was posting. 

*****

Three months later, Tyler was barely above 250, when Josh had stepped the 2K reach mark. He was still posting Tumblr screenshots Tyler was seeing all over Instagram in one day, he was still spelling in a way that made Tyler cringe, and he still hadn't followed Tyler back. Tyler would always comment, always like, but he was still unnoticed by the other boy. Only the big accounts were noticed. Tyler found it unfair. But he wouldn't tell anyone about it. He wouldn't even rant about it on Twitter. A Twitter account he had 48 followers, that mostly were free follow accounts, nobody would answer him, nobody would like his post, or retweet.

He had found Josh account, 10K, Tyler still wasn't jealous, maybe Josh deserved it, deserved his followers count, Tyler was sure he didn't, only interacting with important accounts, people loved him, and Tyler was still confused about it.

At school, girls were still trying to get into his pants or into his heart. But Josh was, like always, giving them the cold shoulder.  
Tyler was still behind his screen, watching from far away, the only difference was he wasn't posting about it. Now he was checking Josh post, reacting to them, trying to be noticed. 

And as much as Tyler wanted to dislike Josh for his followers count, he couldn't, he had grown to love him, to love his shitty post.

*****

By the end of the year, Tyler was barely posting anymore, his followers count was stagnating, and nobody seemed to notice Tyler's absence on social medias. Nobody asked him where he was, if he was okay, if he needed someone to talk to.

Yet, Tyler was on his phone, more than ever. Checking Josh account, but not only Josh's one. He was following big accounts, trying to be noticed by them, it never worked, but Tyler was still trying.

He was telling himself that maybe by being noticed by them would make people wonder who he was, the boy coming out of nowhere, noticed by an important person.  
Tyler was breaking his sleeping schedule, staying up all night, by fear of missing something. It could be Josh, it could be one of his favorite band members, he needed to stay up to not miss a thing. He had activated most of his notifications, and sometimes he would be the first to like a post, taking a screenshot, proud. But he would not show it to anyone, because nobody would care. So he was keeping it to himself, his little secret. 

*****

The next year came around, Tyler had lost followers, Josh was hitting fame more than ever. Tyler hadn't posted in months, and still nobody missed it.  
He had bad purple marks under his eyes, he was sleepy all the time, and most importantly, he had a crush on Josh. 

He liked him as much as he detested him. The boy with green hair and 5,5k followers on Instagram. The boy that didn't even acknowledge his existence. 

At school Tyler was still behind his phone, the only friend he had, long gone to hang out with more important people, more talkative, more everything Tyler wasn't.  
And Tyler didn't care, maybe he deserved it, he was always on his phone, checking Twitter every passing minute, liking every post possible on Instagram.  
Tyler sometimes wanted to post, but he advised himself, because nobody wanted to see his depressing post, nobody wanted to see his aesthetic in their feed.  
Nobody wanted to see what he had to say, they wanted to see what Josh had to say, what Josh was doing. 

*****

Febuary, it's been a year since Josh came around, a year since Tyler life had changed. He wasn't the same. He was more reserved, more quiet, more on his phone. His family started to worry, they wanted him to go out a little, to make friends. But Tyler only wanted to stay in his room, checking his media, not to miss a thing, and maybe finally be noticed. He didn't know why being noticed had been such a fuss, probably because it would prove that he was someone. Someone capable of making interesting posts, that would interest big accounts.

Tyler had lost interest in writing, his writer's block was more powerful than ever, it made him sad, but he was comforting himself by watching Josh life. 

Checking every new picture, every new things about him. And even if Tyler had never spoke to him, it felt like they were best friend. Someday Tyler would dream they were friends, and maybe more than friends. He would imagine all the memories they could make together. All the good things they could do.  
And in these moments, Tyler understood all the girls in school. They wanted a chance to have this with Josh. Tyler would never make a move, he would always try his chance only.  
He wondered how he could have a crush on someone he didn't even knew, but he quickly stopped questioning it. 

*****

2 years later, and Tyler was still behind his phone, checking Josh online, checking everything possible, he didn't go to college, and neither did Josh. Tyler was still living with his parents, doing nothing of his days apart from being on his phone. Josh was working at a record shop. Tyler had always wanted to stop by, but he was barely leaving his house anymore. Better in it, away from the world. 

Online, he had stopped commenting, liking, and sharing. 

And still nobody cared. It made Tyler cry at night. This feeling of insecurity, this feeling of uselessness, the feeling of being unwanted. He knew he was being ridiculous, his parents told him it countless times, his therapist told him it too. But he couldn't help it.  
He just wanted some recognition, from anyone, he didn't care, anyone online would do the trick. Anyone telling him he had helped them at some point, telling him he was nice, he was as important as Josh, that he is being missed.

*****

Four months later, and Tyler was barely sleeping or eating anymore. He changed therapist, tried to get back into a normal life. But he couldn't, he still has the need to know things, to know if something important was happening online. 

Apparently Josh was struggling in his life, and everybody was willing to help him, Tyler found it hypocritical and pathetic. Who was here for him 3 years ago when he needed to speak ? 

Nobody, because nobody cared about the quiet boy in the back of the class, always on his phone, the boy that tried to help people with his words, with his texts, with his emotions. He was even sharing his music, something he was extremely self-conscious about; and still his, because he totally stopped playing the piano and singing at the same time he stopped being active online.

Nobody needed him except his family, and sometimes he wondered if they really needed him. Always screaming at him, never letting him explain his mind.  
At one point Tyler wondered if the world wouldn't be better if he wasn't around.  
Being a burden to anyone. Josh wouldn't miss him, because he didn't know who Tyler was, and his family would finally stop yelling at him, and finally they could rest.

*****

Five years later, and Tyler was carefully walking down the streets of his hometown, long sleeves covering his arms, covering his scars. He was hiding his eyes behind black sunglasses, covering his purple marks, from lack of sleep. It was the first time in so many years he was out by himself.  
His new therapist had advised him to go outside, to try and sociabilize, or at least, see the world, its change. And indeed, many things had changed since Tyler was 14, more buildings, less green spaces. The passerbies seemed to be more in a rush, all head low, focused on their phone. 

Tyler spotted a little kid, probably not older than 14, and Tyler smiled melancholically. He mentally wished good luck to the little boy, and hoped he wouldn't end up like him.  
Still looking at the kid, he didn't notice the person in front of him, they bumped into each other. Tyler's sunglasses fell to the ground emitting a little sound, and as he looked at the stranger to apologize, his breath got stuck in his throat. 

Bring pink hair, black gauges, brown eyes. Tyler would recognize him anywhere. Josh. Tyler was at a loss for words, and Josh simply offered him a kind smile before walking away.  
The recognition Tyler had so long craved for was given to him. When he tried to forget the last ten years of life, here it was. Silent tears were running down Tyler cheeks, he didn't notice them, he was too upset to. Every emotion he had felt during the past years were coming back to him. His evny, his jealousy, the love he had felt for Josh, everything was here again. And Tyler was crying in the middle of a street. Alone. Because nobody cared, even now.

*****

When in Febuary, his phone stopped working, he didn't buy a new one.


End file.
